He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
You text me last night that you invented a new food. Cheese-less grilled cheese. Congrats, you made toast.
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
FUCK WHALES
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize