Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize