You're completely useless in the revolution.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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