Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Nope. She just screamed at me "YOU WERE A FAILED ABORTION" and "I'LL PUT ANTHRAX IN YOUR PILLOW YOU LITTLE FUCK". Best mother award ever
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I like dinosaurs. I like penises. It's kind of a win win
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I am eating a fluff-a-nutter sandwich at the gym right now. I brought vodka too.
Randomize
