Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
hahaha every time i hear a motorcycle i think about that one time you almost died
Thanks for the flashbacks you prick.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
she bought my drinks all night, made me breakfast in the morning, and let me use her expensive hair products before i left. best one night stand ever.
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