Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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