He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
