where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
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