i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
If he gets me coffee, cold or no I'll make him see Jesus with my mouth.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Randomize
