You really coming over, don't trick.
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
You know you're fucked up when you decide to pour fireball whiskey in your vegetable beef soup
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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