i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I mean I'm not saying I have my life together but I did just put nerds in a bottle of champagne and then drank from the bottle
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
Randomize
