when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Woke up next to my vibrator and a recipe for fudge brownies. If that doesn't scream I NEED TO GET LAID, then I don't know what else could.
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