its not stalking. its research.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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