well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
