how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
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