haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
he puts the penis in happiness.
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Randomize
