Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
