and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Sorry I had passed out by this time I think, with the chicken fingers ON my face in my bed, with all the lights on, and ketchup all over.
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
To be fair, this is a tequila-while-rewatching-Benedict-Cumberbatch-as-Van-Gogh idea, so I don't know if it will hold up tomorrow.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
