so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Fuck it, if you can't drink cheep beer and whiskey with me, I don't want you.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
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