I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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