Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I love that we can live in a world where I can Google "Harry Potter lizard" and an illustration for my dream pops up
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
