it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
