just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
Everytime she tries to call me all I can think about is when she tripped walking down my steps during her walk of shame. Then I laugh until it goes to voicemail
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
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