he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
