I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In the ER. 2nd degree burns. Drunken attempt to make gasoline scented candles.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize