I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize