Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
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