There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
And by that I mean I told her the plot of the first batman movie as my life and it took her like 20 minutes to figure it out
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
A little boy in a bathroom stall just shouted "mom where's your penis?? Is it inside you?"
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
