accomplished twins. life is a go
In America we eat man semen.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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