You really coming over, don't trick.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Randomize
