i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Randomize
