when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
