How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
