I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize
