I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
I just saw that your im name has '4eva' in it. Your man card has been revoked.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
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i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
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His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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