If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
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