You're so nebulous sometimes
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Randomize
