My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
so i realized that he's only my physical relationship and beer is my emotional relationship...
I haven't lost it. I know I'm not a prophet. It was a joke.
After the edible you claimed you were talking to my cat. We're in our 30s now, what was once cute is now a liability.
Randomize
