No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
