The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
17 Women That Lost Condoms Up Their Lady Parts
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Can I color on your dick again?
He broke up with me over the phone while I was getting my bush waxed into a "D" for his surprise birthday present. Talk about bad timing...
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I shoulda been born a dude. There's too much power in a vagina.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm eating year old chocolate from the trash can. It was in a ziploc bag but still, this is a new low. Help me.
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