I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
