Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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