id be glad to
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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