I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
I have grass duct taped all over my body
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
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