I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
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