i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
You are the jesus of drinking
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Randomize
