He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
well you can't waste a boner
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
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