omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I hooked up with a British man... Wiz Khalifa has your bra... Couldn't have been a more successful night!
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
