If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize