did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
ARE YOU DEAD? TEXT Y FOR YES OR N FOR NO.
Randomize
