Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I'm determined to sit on that face.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
that may or may not have been my penis.
Randomize
