More tranny stories later!
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I haven't even had my coffee yet and you're being slutastic
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
Randomize
